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Archive for the ‘Politics’ Category

POLITICAL CHANGE FOR A DOLLAR!

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The candidates were asked to make change at the last democratic debate. Sadly, Barak Obama and Hillary Clinton had none. If I had 4 quarters for a dollar, I would totally make change for this hot reporter!

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Written by heavynews

January 11, 2008 at 6:55 pm

KELLY PICKLER SHOWS THE WORLD THAT SHE IS “MORE DUMBER” THAN MISS SOUTH CAROLINA.

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And best of all, she gets to vote! And what’s even scarier is that there are more people like Kelly Pickler and Miss South Carolina than there are of you and your erudite buddies. If you thought there was no chance in hell that Mike Huckabee could be the next President of the United States, guess again. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again ; the movie “Idiocracy” is not a fictional satire, it is a crystal ball.

Written by heavynews

November 30, 2007 at 7:35 pm

MIKE HUCKABEE AND CHUCK NORRIS ARE COMING TO SAVE THE MOTHERF*CKING DAY, YEAH!

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This commercial for Republican Presidential candidate, Mike Huckabee, proves that Mike Judge’s 2006 film, “Idiocracy”, was not a futuristic satire, but a documentary from the future. How did the Republican Party fall this far from the tree? We can’t wait for the democratic response – my money is on Hillary doing “Dick in a Box” with Justin Timberlake while gloating that her Johnson is firm on foreign policy.

Written by heavynews

November 21, 2007 at 8:04 pm

MATTEL RECALLS YET ANOTHER TOY!

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bumpemhumpemrobots


Poor Mattel. They’ve had a tough year. First there was the recall on the Barbie accessories, then the Big Big World 6-in-1 Bongo Band Toys, the Geo Trax Locomotive Toys, and now comes a recall of their new Bump ‘Em Hump ‘Em Robots. A Mattel spokesperson commented that they deeply regret any emotional harm caused by the production and marketing gaffe and promises to make a healthy donation to the Parents Against Same Sex Robot Relations and the Committee to Re-Elect Anyone Who Hates Gays.

Written by heavynews

September 7, 2007 at 7:17 pm

NEWS YOU CAN DANCE TO!

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Written by heavynews

September 5, 2007 at 7:37 pm

LOCAL “DRUNKS WITH GUNS” CLUB SEEN AS LIBERATORS IN IRAQ.

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COALITION of the WILLING

Written by heavynews

June 22, 2007 at 9:57 pm

SCIENTISTS SAY DOGS ARE GETTING SMARTER.

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Scientists are now predicting that dogs may one day be smarter than humans. It seems they’ve found that dog’s brains have been growing larger while the human brain has actually been shrinking. Watch this video for further detail – and be nicer to Fido. Your future ancestors will thank you.

Written by heavynews

June 7, 2007 at 5:11 pm